Ive been playing online since I was 13 years old. Ive always been passionate about the game. I used to dream of being a professional. I have put more hours into this game than many. I have read books I have watched videos I have studied people I have done everything in my power to become a quality poker player. And you no what I think ive hit a wall. Yes I understand poker is a game that you learn every day and no one will ever master the game its just impossible to master. Ive played in many major online tourneys but never hit the big 50k score. Thats what a player needs to continue his path online I feel in my opinion. Im 19 and turn 20 this spring. My shot at the PCA was shot down this past December. The heartbreaking thing is that a fellow 19 year old ended up winning the PCA for $2.2 million. He ended up being the youngest player to win the PCA Main Event. Im not gonna lie I was extremely pissed to read that.

I havnt had my shot at a real event. I really thought I was going to be playing in the PCA until I got donked off on the river in the final round. Im going to play the step system again in hopes of winning a LAPT seat. And then start getting ready for college in the fall

I am currently playing for step 1 tickets trying to accumulate

won 3 step 2 tickets

well since you've gotten so much expierence playing you should realize by now that you've had some really great games and have won a few minor tourneys.with so many games and ppl in the running too you can have good days good weeks or just no luck at all.it puts us all on a ego boost after a win and we go in search of higher stakes to move up just to lose it. my take is that you win a 100.00 or less put it all in on 1 without rebuys and try to win. if you lose and you feel that you'd been better off playing smaller amounts its gonna be hard to move up
when you play at a lower level most of the time its hard to win a big one.it all winds up to the point of if your in the right tourney at the right time catching the right cards calling the right hands and having luck on your side your gonna win. ever get in a game where in the first 10 minutes of the game you jump to first place and have a good stack that can last you most of the game till crunch time just to go card dead and not catch till your almost in the money and about to bubble then go back up again just to reach the final table then go card dead again or get bluffed or sucked out on?i guess my point is if you want to do it and make a profession out of it you'd do well to learn at the lower levels and then make a big deposit and go for it.play the big games, give it a shot the odds are eventually you'll win a big one but its hard to do it if your not in it.dont give up just go for the big ones every dog has its day.

I don't agree with midget about "taking shots" at the big ones. Seems to me like a good way to go broke. Poker isn't all about luck. I do agree that you may want to mix in some MTT without excessively risking your bankroll to vary the grind of STT and ring games.

Unless you can get bankrolled by someone else ( in college that may be Mum and Da), then bankroll management becomes a big concern. Any pro will tell you that it is just as important as any other aspect of play.

If you have the goal of being the youngest (fill in the blank) in poker, then you may be setting yourself up for a lifetime of disappointment. If you want to make a living then you may want to focus on enjoying playing the game without taking undue risks, just like in any other business.

I agree with PL. You should give yourself some times to succeed into your enterprise, afterall you're only 20. Maybe you'll need to learn more about life in itself and less about poker, as poker is part of your life but can't be all your life.
I'm sure that every pro poker player wants to win the ME WSOP, but how many will succeed? So you got to have goals in life that's true, but it have to construct you and not destroy you.
My owngoals are far from yours, as i'd love to be the oldest winner of the ME.
Why i have to wait for almost 30 years prior to be able to succeed in my goal.

I try to differentiate between goals and dreams. Goals are things I'd like to achieve and where I'm taking steps that give me a reasonable chance of success. Where I'm not taking such steps, those things are dreams.

I havnt been playing much I just been playing micro games 1 or 2 days a week on stars. I think I no what my problem is but I cant do anything about it yet. But really something isnt clicking in my head and im dead serious when I say this something just isnt CLICKING. You no my brain used to work crazy when I played online I mean I can still do it its just that somethings missing. So therefore ive slowed down a lot trying to get back up to speed slowly. I played some 5cent 10cent rush poker with $4 and ran it up to $100 easily just 3 betting people preflop rush poker just brings me back to the old party poker days when all you had to do was 3 bet every hand.

But I dont plan on playing on full tilt anymore I just wanted to see what rush poker was.

Anyways I been chilling a lot lately working on my game as much as I can I do not want to be a pro though that was just a foolish dream I had in high school. I would probably freak out if i was a pro and get to stressed. Im going to school to be a nurse though I think its my true calling in life and will do what I have to do


thanks for all the comments

another thing I have noticed in my game now is that I seem to be gun shy now I just seem to not wanna fire any bullets any more

Sounds like you have some issues man...About the tourneys-keep playing your game. All you can do is get yourself in position to make the big hit. Maybe your kings get cracked, maybe your flush gets beat by a full house on the river but eventually things will even out. Keep trying.

I think poker and life is all about taking shots and chances. If you don't take any chances you will never win. I am a free player starting from zero and I take as many chances as I can. They don't always work out but if you play enough tourneys you will win.